Texas Standoff: Man Holds Mother Hostage With Sub Sandwich While Wearing Ripped Flag

Well, it seems like Texas Man just might give Florida Man a run for his money.

In a classic case of what the hell is happening? a local beat page, Hutchinson County Mugshots, reported that deputies with Hutchinson County Sheriff's Office were dispatched to a rather unusual scene early Saturday morning.

Apparently, a caller had reported a barricaded subject and a possible hostage situation in the 300 block of Cedar St in Borger, Texas.

When they arrived at the Lil' Caesar's pizzeria, the report states that they found a local man couched on the roof in just his underwear, with a Frankenstein-style Texas-U.S. flag tied around his neck.

The post reads as follows:

Upon arrival, deputies observed William ‘Bill’ Davis, age 53, crouched on the roof of the pizzeria, wielding what seemed to be a $5 foot long from Subway.
Davis was reported to have what seemed to be an American flag ripped in half and re-sewn with the other half of a Texas flag, then tied around his neck. Additionally, Davis had at some point, stripped down to his underwear.
Deputies reported that Davis had a hostage, who he kept control of by brandishing the sub sandwich in an aggressive manner at frequent intervals.
The hostage was later identified as Geraldine Eudora ‘Momma’ Davis, 86, by neighbors who recognized her distinctive muumuu.
The investigation later revealed the motive in this incident; ‘Momma asked Bill to empty her ashtray & take the pizza rolls out of the oven while she was at bingo’. Bill became deeply angered by this request and subsequently lured Momma to his workplace, with the promise of a Deep!Deep! Dish Pepperoni Pizza with extra pepperoni.

Sheriff Kemp and K9 Deputy Estrada took Mr. Davis into custody without further incident, for the charges of: Terroristic Threat of a Family Member, Public Indecency and Desecration of a Flag.
He is being held on a $26 bond.

Hook, Line, Sinker

Now. Before you get too invested into how ridiculous the story seems....If you venture into the comments, you'll find that the entire hostage scenario is a well-played April Fool's joke.

An April Fool's joke that apparently everyone else fell for all the way until the end....which, curiously, says quite a bit about the state of criminal affairs in that area.

Truth is stranger than fiction....Unless it's an April Fool's joke from Hutchinson County Mugshots.